I am Raj Gorsia. I have come to a point in life where my name means nothing. I don’t value my identity, because i don’t see value in measuring myself based on some beliefs i have about who i am.
Who am i? Who are you? The simple truth is — nobody and everybody.
I will expand as we continue…
But first, lets go back to younger and more troubled days..
Here’s my invitation as you continue to read. Read this about you. This isn’t about me, this isn’t about the story. I use myself as an instrument to help you to access you. The deepest part of you.
Lets continue.
The Raj Of A Lifetime
I spent most of my life sweating because I quite literally did the opposite of “Don’t sweat the small stuff”.
If you asked me which superhero i was, I would have called myself Anxiety Boy. Yes boy, because i didn’t even see myself as a man until 25 years old.
If you asked me what my superpowers were, I would have said. Running away from myself. Like a shadow that chased me around all day.
But this isn’t some kind of sob story to enroll you into a dark place within yourself. I lived a good life on paper. I had fun with friends, I had girlfriends, I smiled and laughed a lot.
I was a Highly Skilled Head Case. I had vast physical abilities, tall, good looking, getting attention from girls, doing well in school. I had all of the potential.
Equally, that’s the word that haunted me…. Potential.
- The girls who liked me, never got to speak to me because I never had the courage to ask them out
- The Physical abilities I purposely kept secret, so only my cousin who i played sports with in my garden knew how good I was. I never tried out for a team, even though i knew i was good at every sport.
- The intelligence in school I dumbed down to deter any attention away from me. I aimed to be a C grade, even though I had the potential to be all A’s.
- And the looks… Well, what’s the use for them?
(Some tears rolled down my eyes as i wrote this…!)
I strived to fit in, to be like everyone else. I did not want to stand out. And that meant dimming my true light in every way possible.
This continued in university, in relationships, career.
Though its funny because no matter how much i dimmed my light, there was an angelic glow following me, and i had a highly successful career, some great life experiences and some good times..
Its like having a Ferrari but not driving it well, its still going to go fast!
One thing i’ve learnt about people is this.
- We are capable of way more than we can imagine.
Infact, most of us know this. And that is why tension builds, its ourselves hitting ourselves in the face saying “Hey Wakeup!”.
I knew this for most of my life. But I slid around in the game of 20%. So no wonder i felt unfulfilled, and tried to fill the gap with short term pleasures like alcohol, food, lifting weights, sex, trips etc.
I do not judge myself, or anyone who does this because at the time I was just doing my thing, having fun too, lots of it! But it did not meet the deeper needs.
Be You.
Here’s another thing that i have discovered since coaching 100s of people. They are me, in another flesh outfit 🙂
We are all humans, we all put our underwear on one leg at a time.
We all feel sad, we all laugh, we all have insecurities.
Here’s something that scares me to tell you about me. I am not scared to die, but I am scared to turn into an old man and tell kids “I wish I….”
That’s why on my 30th Birthday I set a commitment to myself. To never let anything stop me from fully being me.
I went on a path of uncovering the secret lies that my unconscious mind was telling me, I became conscious of them and it brought up days of tears and purging.
It’s the trick of our minds of – don’t know, don’t feel. So once you know, you feel.
I went on an extreme inner journey where I uncovered old memories from the past, i felt the pain over and over again. I found out who i really was, underneath the patterns of automatic behaviours and thoughts.
It was like finding a golden version of me that was locked away in a dark room. Quite literally, my meditations took me to a scary room (and the bottom of the ocean!) with barriers along the way.
During the process, i discovered the me who had ideas that never happened, the knowing that was never said, and the me that never grew up! A lot of people are walking around with the same programming from when they were 3 years old, I know i was.
Long Hair, Don’t Care
One of the ideas that I had 7 years ago was to grow my hair. I was with a girlfriend at the time, and i kept saying to her, I want to grow my hair!
It never happened.
- Just like the idea of travelling around the world (which i eventually did after 4 years of overthinking…!)
- Just like the dream to have my own business as a personal trainer (which i eventually did after 6 years of thinking, but in the guise of Transformative Coaching)
- Just like the idea to have muscles and be strong (which i eventually did, and i became darn beastly!)
- Just like idea of being confident speaking to women from around the world. (i did that too)
Hold on… As i write this, i realise that I have long hair in this exact moment.
So what happened?
Well… The seeds were planted years ago. But I added years of thinking to them. Years passed before I Embodied what i wanted.
New Vision
Here’s my new way of seeing things.
I wanted all of those things, but I was coming from a place of insecurity. In fact, they were attempts to fill a gap once again. To feel secure in myself.
Even the hair idea, i wanted it to be the “cool version” of long hair. I wanted it for the image.
That isn’t why i have long hair now. I often say that it grew itself, as i grew.
I did not grow it for the result of an image, infact the opposite. It grew because i stopped caring, i stopped seeing value in having a haircut every 2 weeks.
How my hair looks does not determine my quality of life or happiness.
With all of this said, I will probably cut my hair and have a “cool” style some day. But it will not be from a place of insecurity or priority. I am full to the brim from the inside now, so the outside feels way smoother.
For most of my life, i dimmed my light. I stopped myself from having what i wanted because I was ruled by the autopilot. Here’s the thing, the same thing that dims your light, is the key to turning it up.
Yes there is a lot of noise about ego being an enemy. But ego is a part of your mind, and you need your mind. Your mind allows you to create a new future, so how can you push it away?
The Key To Mastery
The one key that i have discovered is that we require UNITY for our lives to be at the highest potential, the highest experience of life is when one is in harmony with every part of oneself.
Like one big happy family! Not exiling one part because it doesn’t do what you say. The ego is the guard for your golden self thats behind it, so you must speak to this ego and uncover the truth of what it wants.
Like a guard, it wants to hear the secret passphrase, or to know that you are safe enough to enter into the king/queens chamber.
In this chamber, your golden self will allow you to tap into every ounce of potential, and you will access levels of living, intelligence, vitality and inspiration that you could never imagine.
And you will use it all to create a life that you could never imagine.
Long Hair…..Don’t Care!
Every artist, musician, dancer and even business person is a creator. They are expressing whats within them with the outside world.
They are being themselves, with their flaws, their messy hair, their stutters and hiccups.
I have learnt that i am the creator of my life, and if i am expressing myself fully, i am liberated and blissful!
The thing you wish you could say to another person, say it!
The idea you have, draw it out!
The tears you feel, let them out.
The you inside, be that.
My life has changed drastically since i turned 30 because i have made my life about expressing myself. In Yoga they say, go into the full expression of the pose! Its a little uncomfortable, but its possible.
The potential inside will rot and turn into resentment, getting angry about a person cutting in front of you in traffic, because you arent fully blissfully living your life!
Getting annoyed when your bill goes up in price, if you were living your life fully, you wouldn’t care!
Feeling frustrated when you see others expressing themselves (i did this a lot), you would love them and high-5 them if you were fully expressing yourself.
Be…You. And You… Will be Free.
My Mission
My mission on this earth is to be like Professor X in the X-Men. To help people to realise they have superpowers, just like i did. And to help them to hone them so that they can be fully themselves in this world, unchained from the mind’s limitations.
Every person in this world has something special about them. How can we exist in this cosmos without believing we are stars. We must shine every single day, this star can go out anytime, so let’s make it happen, now.
I spent 7 years thinking about ideas, i spent 25 years stuck in my head and trying to convince everyone that I am an equal.
I’ve spent the past 5 years realising how beautifully electrifying that I am, how everyone is, and how life is.
For the rest of my years, I will spend my life in this mode, with the purpose of showing others their potential, and how to use them to create illustrious levels of harmony and success within and with-out their lives.
If this article spoke to you in some way — drop me a message via the contact me button in the link below:Raj Gorsia | LinktreeWelcome, please enjoy more stories and free resources below. Message me to chat.linktr.ee
Invitation
I have wish to give you two things. Drive and inspiration to create your blissfully beautiful life.
Message me with your one big take away from this article and I will send you a few resources that will help you to further your journey.
Stay as You, Only you
Raj
P.s — Here is a song that i want to invite you to listen to before you continue with your day.
It is a great way to underscore everything that I said in this article. It lights me up everytime 🙂
- Its called “Gotta be Me” By Sammy Davis Jr
